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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25082332">you broke me first</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/posies/pseuds/posies'>posies</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Scene, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Angst, Book 6: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Death Eater Draco Malfoy, M/M, Mentions of Voldemort, Redeemed Draco Malfoy, Saviour!Harry, draco already knows, harry realizes he's in love, mentions of Lucius Malfoy - Freeform, mentions of narcissa malfoy - Freeform, prepare tissues, sad!Draco, sad!harry, two faces of the same coin, vulnerable!Draco, where draco is truly the boy who had no choice :(</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 04:02:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,923</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25082332</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/posies/pseuds/posies</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>draco malfoy has been ordered to kill albus dumbledore. one night, he effectively corners the professor on top of the astronomy tower. he plans on finally accomplishing his mission. harry doesn't plan on letting him.</p><p>OR an alternate battle of the astronomy tower in which harry isn't hidden and talks draco out of committing murder.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Draco Malfoy &amp; Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>160</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>you broke me first</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>hi! this one shot was heavily inspired by "you broke me first" by tate mcrae, hence the title.<br/>i cried a bit while writing this but i felt like it had to be done because,,, let's be honest, we all love angsty drarry and we love them even more when they bond and actually speak of their unspoken connection!<br/>i hope you all enjoy &lt;3</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The night was cold. Wind blew painfully through Harry’s messy black locks, tears slowly gathering in his usually shiny emerald eyes – they were, in fact, not glistening at all on this night atop of the Astronomy Tower.</p><p>The sight before him was simply too much for him to accept. He refused to accept this.</p><p>Draco Malfoy stood before him, his pale blonde hair – it was almost white, Harry could not help but notice – falling in front of his usually immaculate mercury-like orbs. His mouth was shaped in an afraid sneer, and his wand was raised. First, at Dumbledore when he had disarmed him, just a few moments ago, and now at Harry himself. The two boys stared at each other for painfully long seconds, their breathing tangled in an irregular mess, before Draco finally spoke.</p><p>“Get out of here, Potter,” his voice was trembling. Harry’s heart broke.</p><p>He wanted to help. He <em>desperately </em>wanted to help. He could see how unwell Draco was. He was fairly certain that Dumbledore had noticed it, too. To be fair, anyone would be able to see how completely and utterly broken Malfoy – <em>Draco</em>, he had stopped being Malfoy at some point this very year, Harry had realized that – was in that moment. He had been for months, really. Harry had noticed this as well. He had seen how lonely Draco had looked every time he stepped foot in the Great Hall, or in class, when he bothered to show up.</p><p>Harry did not want to “get out of here”. He wanted to be the Saviour, for once in his goddamn life. Draco’s saviour. If only the other boy would let him.</p><p>“No,” Harry breathed out, forcefully, shakily. “I’m not going anywhere.”</p><p>Draco’s eyes then narrowed with horror and disbelief, and he took a step closer to Harry, as if to make a point.</p><p>“As you wish,” he replied, his eyes now travelling from Harry to Dumbledore, who was still standing in silence, right next to him.</p><p>“Draco, this is not you.”</p><p>As soon as the words left his lips, Harry regretted them immediately. Draco’s head snapped back to him. He looked angry, and hurt, but nonetheless, furious. Even more so than when Dumbledore had also assumed the same thing of him, just moments before.</p><p>“You don’t know who I am.” His voice was scared, shaky. Unstable.</p><p>“I do, though,” Harry took a step closer to Draco, and watched as the blonde boy’s eyes widened, and as he inevitably took a step back.</p><p>“Following me around all year doesn’t mean you know me, Potter,” Draco sarcastically drawled, but Harry could still hear the fear in his voice.</p><p>Harry took a deep breath and held eye contact with Draco. He had to do something about this. He had to stop this. He simply had to.</p><p>“I didn’t mean that. Deep down, you know that I know you. You know me, too.”</p><p>Draco’s traits changed from anger to confusion for half a second, but as soon as Harry blinked, his mask was back into place.</p><p>“Don’t you understand?” Draco’s speech definitely betrayed the terror he felt then, and Harry could see tears slowly gathering in his eyes, making their silver shade shine in the moonlight, “I have to do this. I have to kill him,” his eyes traveled to Dumbledore once again, as if to make sure that the two men in the room knew who he was referring to, before settling back on Harry’s fragile figure, “or he’s going to kill me.”</p><p>Harry shook his head slowly, his eyes wide. It dawned upon him that Draco genuinely thought that he had no choice; he thought that the only road he could go down on was the one where he became a murderer. Harry also realized that, even with this horrific tattoo covering his arm, Draco did not believe in Voldemort. At least, not anymore. He was terrified of him and was acting on one sentiment and one sentiment only – family.</p><p>“You, and your parents,” Harry murmured softly, “is that correct?”</p><p>Draco’s mouth trembled slightly, a tear clearly sliding down his cheek. He nodded numbly, never once lowering the wand he was still pointing at Harry.</p><p>“Let me help you,” Harry said, taking a step further. This time, Draco did not move back. He stayed put, his gaze on Harry. Always on Harry.</p><p>“How?”</p><p>The word was pronounced so quietly, so subtly, that Harry was certain he had imagined it. However, Draco’s expression told him that he had indeed spoken, that it was real. Hope had made its way into his previously terrified cold eyes.</p><p>“Join us. We will protect you, and your parents. I promise. Just – don’t do this. <em>This is not you.</em> You’re helpless, backed in a corner. I understand that. We both do,” he pointed to the older man to his right, “Voldemort broke you. But I – I can fix you.”</p><p>What happened next was like a flash in front of Harry’s eyes. He saw Draco’s face regain its past anger, his traits mean and his breath heavy, before he heard a faint “Expelliarmus” and, suddenly, Harry was wandless. Draco had disarmed him.</p><p>Harry failed to hide his shock as he stared at his opponent with his mouth hanging open, and risked a look at his wand, which was now being held by Draco’s long and slim fingers.</p><p>“Fix me?” Draco laughed humorlessly. He held eye contact with Harry then, and what he said next traveled all over his body like venom. “You broke me first.”</p><p>The confusion and pain written on Harry’s face must have been apparent to Draco because he kept on speaking.</p><p>“<em>I can tell the wrong sort for myself, thanks</em>,” Draco continued, and walked closer towards where Harry was standing.</p><p>Harry’s breathing was now shallow, panicked. He remembered that sentence all too well. It was what he had told Draco all these years ago on the Hogwarts Express. Before they had even made it to the castle. Before his life even truly started. Before he even had the chance to <em>know him</em>. Guilt washed over him like a cold shower.</p><p>“You want to fix me, Potter? Now, when a war is approaching? Now, when I am about to end the life of someone you hold dear?” He glanced at Dumbledore, and shakily raised his wand back to him.</p><p>“How about when I asked for your friendship?” He spit out, his eyes back on Harry, but his wand still in place in front of the Headmaster. “How about when, so many times this year, I was silently crying out for help, and no one even gave me a second glance?”</p><p>Draco was almost shouting now, tears angrily falling down his cheeks. “<em>How about when you cut open my chest and almost killed me, Potter?</em> What about then? Didn’t you want to fix me, then?”</p><p>It was raining. At least, that’s what Harry had thought, until he realized that the water he could feel on his lips, and all over his face, was nothing but his very own tears – he was sobbing silently, and he had not even noticed. He was crying almost as much as Draco was.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” he choked out, his voice weak, but somehow taking up all the space in the almost empty Astronomy Tower.</p><p>“Draco, I fucked up. I – I should have given you a chance. I should have done more for you this year when I saw that you needed it, and I should have figured out what that spell did before I cast it,” he stepped slowly towards Draco, and let himself relax a little when he saw that the taller boy was not moving away, nor pointing his wand at Harry. In fact, he looked frozen in place. His grey eyes were searching in Harry’s green ones, for something, anything that could confirm that Harry had indeed no idea what the spell’s outcome might be when he had used it on him that day in the bathroom.</p><p>Harry was now close enough to touch him. He raised his arm tentatively, and, when he saw that Draco was merely watching his movements with shock and curiosity, with absolutely no intention to stop him, he gently placed his hand on the other boy’s wrist. Draco gasped softly, and Harry noticed as his hand came in contact with the smooth fabric of the black suit he was wearing that Draco was shaking. Quite fervently.</p><p>Harry took a deep breath and gently lowered Draco’s arm, his eyes still piercing through his.</p><p>“I can’t change the past,” he continued, his tone apologetic, almost affectionate, “but I can do something about the future. You do not have to keep on living with him, Draco. You do not have to witness innocent people being tortured anymore. You do not have to become one of them. This mark on your arm, it is meaningless. Don’t let it define you,” Harry paused, taking in a shaky breath, before saying what he said next.</p><p>“Contrary to what you might think, I never asked to be the Chosen One. I never asked to be the Boy Who Lived. I never asked to be the Saviour of the world,” he completed, his voice now a whisper in the night.</p><p>His hand was still firmly clamped on Draco’s arm, and neither of them did anything to move it away. They simply stared at each other, both now completely oblivious to Dumbedore’s presence in the room.</p><p>Draco’s eyes were still fresh with tears and somewhat distant, but they were looking at Harry with interest, and that was all that mattered. He was getting through to him.</p><p>However, in that moment, Harry found himself wondering why he was taking this to heart. Yes, he was doing it to save Dumbledore – after all, he was the first guide that Harry had been given in this evil world – but he knew that there was more to it than that. He could have simply disarmed Draco earlier this evening, stunned him, petrified him, <em>anything.</em> He could have stopped him any other way, but he found himself acquiring this desire and determination to get through to Draco and to verbally convince him not to become an assassin. And so, at this very moment, Harry realized that what he was currently doing was about saving Dumbledore as much as it was about saving Draco. It was about saving two people he cared about. Two people he loved.</p><p>As the realization dawned upon him, his grip softened on Draco’s arm, but the gentle traces of his fingers made it clear that he did not intend on letting go. Instead, he lowered his hand to Draco’s, and intertwined their fingers, effectively trapping Draco’s wand in their embrace. He heard the other boy’s sharp intake of breath and could feel his own heart beating quickly. They had touched before, but not like this. Never like this.</p><p>“I never asked to be the Saviour of the world,” Harry repeated, his eyes never leaving Draco’s, “but I am asking to be yours.”</p><p>Draco’s shoulders slumped at the words, and he exhaled heavily in relief – as if something incredibly heavy had just been released from him. He then let his head fall on Harry’s chest, his hold on his saviour’s hand becoming even tighter. Harry’s arms immediately took hold of Draco’s fragile body, and he passed a hand through his almost white hair as he held him in his arms.</p><p>“Yes,” he heard, a faint whisper only. But it was more than enough.</p>
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